I know magic. Cos I am Dawn Potter!

Monday, November 05, 2007

Here I am, home alone in the middle of a lonely afternoon. I'm listening to No Promises by Shayne Ward, I promised u I would. Its prolly the 10th time its playing now...

I know I should be opening my book and concentrating on it, my paper's on Friday! But but...its so hard, esp now that I'm listening to that song. The tune's so catchy and its really nice. And my mind keeps playing back to the scene on the balcony... like its right out of a movie.

I've never really imagined doing something like that, and it just blew me away. I really seriously doubt I if I could ever look at u at the way I should now. U're told me loads of times, that its a test of time, a test of faith, a test of emotions. Sometimes I see the point of it, but sometimes I just don't. Even if one problem is solved, the most basic problem, there are still so many more to come. So many people in our lives to handle, I probably wouldn't be able to find the energy to handle all that.

Sometimes I wonder, couldn't we have met at a different time? Or is the whole purpose of it meeting at this time and that right here, right now, its the right time? Maybe if we never met now, we wouldn't have reacted the way we did. Do u think so? All these ideology about life, are they all created to make ordinary people like us feel more emo and movie-star-lifestyle-like or is it really real? So many questions that I ask myself each day, but not one day do I feel that I'm closer to finding the answers to my many questions.

I really really want someone I can communicate with. To me, communication is everything. Being able to communicate means being comfortable in my own skin, not putting on an act for you or me or anyone else for that matter. I'm not gonna say I like something when I don't, or say I don't mind something when I do. Communication to me, is being able to tell you 'hey! your nose is big and ugly!' and not worrying about hurting you when I do, telling you 'u know, sometimes I really feel vulnerable and weak' and not feeling afraid that u might take advantage of that or laugh at me for feeling that way.

Of cos, there might be little things about u that I might not like. But I might grow to be comfortable with it next time? I don't know. I only know, what happened that day just makes my mind wonder back all the time... makes me wonder if it was meant to be.

dawnL 2:32 PM

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